In-coherence
A practice to open our hearts and minds
I did a half day meditation retreat recently and my intention for the practice was to feel more aligned, less scattered, and to embrace the coherence that occurs in a group of people coming together mindfully.
Most of our interactions these days are ones of incoherence instead of “in coherence” and it breaks my heart. Our disconnection breeds ambivalence and contempt that hurts ourselves and others.
I’m taking liberties with the word incoherence, but I’m seeing it as the opposite of this definition of coherence:
“the quality of forming a unified whole.”
I have a practice that I occasionally do to bring myself into coherence in day to day life. It involves going out into the world and with every person I encounter, whether we interact or not, I wholeheartedly say “I love you” internally. I find that my whole perspective changes when I do this. I see every human as having struggles and joys that are unique to them. I see them as closer to a family member or a friend rather than a stranger.
It reminds me of a Buddhist1 saying that we all want happiness, and we all want to be free from suffering. Some people are easier to love than others, of course. I try to remember that all of us (if we are honest), at times go about this goal of happiness in unhelpful and even harmful ways. With love we can come back to what I consider our true nature: loving, generous, openhearted.2
Nowadays we are even disconnected from our own bodies and minds. What if we could share this same grace and love with ourselves?
There is a Buddhist practice that says “may all beings have happiness without one exception”. If all beings have the true causes of happiness (connection with a depth of being and knowing beyond our dualistic reality), they would not hurt others. As the saying goes “hurt people hurt people”.
It also reminds me of a dedication (intention recited after meditation) from one of my Buddhist teachers: “May the inspiring energy that ignites wisdom and compassion remain present in the depths of our being. May this energy radiate to others and profoundly open their good hearts and awaken their minds.”
It is a revolutionary stance to choose connection and coherence in this day in age. It seems like everything around us is screaming “disconnect!” or “this (next thing you can buy or subscribe to) will bring you connection”. But connection is available here and now, always.
None of us are saints (I don’t think) and so we do what we can, little by little, to awaken our own hearts and minds and let that trickle to others. We frequently fail and we try again, over and over.
So I wish for you (and me) that we find the place within ourselves that recognizes our coherence with our own being, other beings, and the world around us, and we do our best to live from there.
Take good care of yourselves my lovelies,
Jenny
P.S. I love incorporating this grounded and connected energy into my mind, body, spirit coaching. I offer one free coaching session (“exploration call”) to anyone who is interested. You can learn more at my website: jennyrobertscoaching.com
I am a practicing Buddhist, but all of these teachings are applicable regardless of your personal beliefs regarding religion or spirituality. I do not intend to proselytize. 😉
This does not mean we don’t speak up to injustice, but I believe keeping everyone’s humanity in mind helps us to go about this in a more effective way.